John Barrowman's love life - childhood agony, extraordinary wedding and kids row

John Barrowman, who recently opened up about the struggles he endured following an X-rated scandal, knew his husband was the one the minute he saw him

John Barrowman has been in love with one man for 30 years - but his happy ending has not come easily.

The Scottish-American actor recently told The Mirror how he 'lost trust' in other people after he was caught up in an X-rated scandal, with former co-stars having claimed he exposed himself on set.

Torchwood star John, 57, has always maintained that such antics were just 'stupid pranks', and he's now expressed disappointment in the lack of support he's received from those he'd thought would be there for him. The star revealed he contemplated suicide after he was caught up in the scandal that he feared had ruined his career.

Here, the Mirror looks at John's relationship with his talented hubby, and the rocky road he's navigated on the road to finding true love...

Hiding sexuality

In a candid piece penned for The Guardian in 2008, John opened up about growing up in midwest America in the '80s - where he remembered homosexuality being treated 'like a curse'. Although John 'never doubted [his] sexuality', he felt he couldn't 'make it a known thing', and put plenty of effort into fitting in.

John recalled: "I would look at a dirty magazine and I would feel drawn to the guy rather than the girl... It would make me feel warm and tingly. After gym class, I'd secretly peek at the other boys in the shower when I knew that I shouldn't. I was nine or 10 and I didn't know what being gay meant.

"Later, I made sure I was good at sports and I worked out so they couldn't call me a wimp. I had to copy the others to fit in and avoid being bullied; I'd date girls, dance with them, go for dinner but I used to panic when I was on her doorstop and I'd have to kiss her."

Coming out after health scare

In a 2009 interview with The Independent, John, who knew he was gay from the age of eight years old, finally came out in his twenties after a health scare left him fearing the worst. John shared: "Every gay man in the late Eighties and early Nineties who got sick thought he was dying of Aids."

After flying home to tell his family, to his great relief, tests showed that John was HIV-negative. It was at this point that he was reportedly prompted to campaign for greater awareness within the LGBTQ+ community.

'Instant' connection

John met his now-husband Scott Gill way back in 1991 after Scott came to watch John act in a production of Rope at the Chichester Festival Theatre. For John, it was love at first sight, and he instantly knew Scott was the man 'he wanted to spend the rest of his life with'.

Although Scott tends to stay out of the limelight, he's known for being a very talented architect, and reportedly even designed their dreamy home on the Welsh coast. Scott also regularly accompanies John on tour, where he can often be seen presiding over the merch stand.

History-making wedding bells

In December 2006, John and Scott declared their love for each other in a small civil service ceremony held in Cardiff, surrounded by friends and family. Then, in 2013, John and Scott made history as one of the very first same-sex couples to marry in the state of California - just one day after the California Supreme Court overturned the ban on gay weddings.

Speaking with the Mirror at the time, John remembered: "I started welling up when we said our vows. It was the same with our civil partnership. I think it was because I never thought we'd be able to do it. Scott and I felt completely different after our civil ceremony like we'd made a big step. But after this I feel very proud, happy and chuffed. It feels right."

During an episode of Loose Women back in 2020, John explained why it was so important for him and Scott to get married even after having already had their civil ceremony. Opening up to hosts Judi Love, Christine Lampard, Kaye Adams and Nadia Sawalha, John divulged: "We were in a situation once where we were coming back into the US, and being a family in the UK, we were in the line coming through customs, and they said, 'Who is this?'"

"I said, 'This is my partner', because we didn't say husband at that time, and he said, 'We don't recognise that here in this country, get out of the line and get over there'. So I said to Scott, 'When this passes, we are going to go, however, we are, go to the registry office and get married, and we did – we woke up in the morning, we got out of bed, put on shorts and a t-shirt, drove down to the registry office, and there's a video of us driving there singing."

Broodiness

Although John and Scott don't have children, John has previously spoken about feeling 'broody'. Speaking on GMTV in 2009, John confessed: "I have got broody and it's over the last year or so and I think it's partially because, also doing this show Tonight's the Night, I'm getting involved with a lot of families. I'm a big family man with my own immediate family but I am, I'm getting broody."

However, in 2018, John revealed that he was having a tough time getting Scott enthused about the prospect of parenthood. Showing emotion during an episode of Im A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here!, John reflected: "Well I still would like to adopt. But I can't just go out and buy one at Tesco and bring it home, it has to be a partnership thing and I don't think Scott is ready for it.

"He keeps saying to me, 'If you wanna do it, just do it, however I can't just do that, as he has to be on board. At the moment I've got a company that I run with my business partner and I'm still on Arrow (TV show) and I'm travelling all over the place and it would be unfair to have a child that I would never really see."

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