Eva Mendes reveals the 'hardest part' of parenting with Ryan Gosling

Actress Eva Mendes has admitted her parenting style is 'not fair' to her children as she opened up about the difficulties of raising her kids alongside husband Ryan Gosling.

The A-lister, 50, shares daughters Esmeralda, 10, and Amada, eight, with 43-year-old Ryan. 

Although the Hollywood heavyweights are known for being extremely tight-lipped when it comes to their family, the Hitch star is now letting fans in on her challenges as a mom.

Eva - who has been engulfed in a romance with Ryan since 2011 - lifted the lid on the 'hardest part' of parenting and the one thing she wishes she could stop doing while speaking to host of Parenting & You podcast, Dr. Shefali. 

The actress fought back tears as she confessed that she 'doesn't like' herself when she 'yells' at her children - adding that she doesn't want them to grow up in 'fear.' 

Read More

Eva Mendes reveals the real reason she may NEVER return to acting

Eva revealed that she likes to work while in the same room as her kids so that she can feel 'connected to them.' 

However, she admitted that the overwhelming amount of emails and her children's constant need for attention sometimes test her patience.

She revealed that although she tries to practice gentle parenting, she finds herself reverting back to how her parents raised her, which is through yelling. 

'I don’t yell when they need me. I'm never like "shut up."  It's not like a "mean" yell, but it doesn’t matter. I yell. And it's this yelling that I find so cultural.

'I'm having a hard time getting through and not yelling. The rushing and the yelling, that's the hardest thing to me,' the actress confessed. 

Eva admitted that she tries her best to avoid raising her voice at her kids. 

When she fails at keeping her cool, the mom-of-two revealed she often thinks about the things she could do better and what kind of mother she is. 

'I don't like myself. I act like a baby,' she said as she recalled the moments she yelled at her children. 

Her confession prompted her to look back on the way she was raised. 

'I hope I don’t look back in 20 years and go "oh shoot," because I really don’t want to raise by fear. That's the one — sorry, I get emotional over it — because it’s so not fair to the kids.

'I hope that I’m not unknowingly putting some pressure on them through fear like I was raised,' she noted. 

Eva was raised by Cuban parents Eva Pérez Suárez and Juan Carlos Méndez. 

Although she grew up with an overwhelming amount of love, the actress admitted that she also felt a sense of fear. 

She noted that before she became a parent, she never wanted to be like her mother. 

'I'm shocked [by] how much I'm like my mother. I adore her. She’s on a pedestal… but yeah, my household when I was little was very chaotic, a lot of screaming, a lot of anxiety, a lot of turmoil, even though I had a loving family,' the actress said. 

Eva admitted that she had a 'very difficult childhood full of trauma,' before noting that 'a lot of shame came up for me because I was like, "I have it so good. My mom, she fought to get here. I was the only one born in the States. How dare I even complain?"' 

Despite struggling with certain aspects of parenting, Eva noted that she is grateful she had children when she was older. 

'In my 20s, I shouldn't have even been around a child. I was just foul-mouthed and smoking. I could not have raised kids in any other era of my life but now, for sure,' she said. 

At the end of the clip, Eva reflected on her decision to step away from the spotlight and focus on her family. 

'The easiest decision I've ever made. I was older and I knew that my kids are going to be little once, and whatever I do or don't do right now is going to affect them the rest of their life,' she said. 

The star and partner of 13 years Ryan fell in love while working on the 2012 movie, The Place Beyond The Pines.

Eva has since focused on other business ventures after the pair became parents and it appears she has no plans to return get back on movie sets any time soon.

Earlier this year, the Ghost Rider star revealed that she and Ryan have somewhat of a 'non-verbal agreement' when it came to her giving up acting and being a 'full-time mom' to their two young daughters.

The Canadian actor has continued to make movies since welcoming his children, while Eva has taken a backseat.